Bill the Palm Tree
Inspired by this photo and written in about 3 seconds flat. Bill is a palm tree.
The sun was shining, the birds were singing, the sky was blue. Bill looked down upon the bustling street below him and sighed.
The people of LA all hurried beneath his fronds, too busy, too preoccupied with their own lives to even glance up at Bill. It was a lonely life, being a palm tree. But at least he had the most beautiful leaves of all the boulevard. Georg who lived across the street only had floppy brown leaves that were nothing to write home about and Gustav didn’t even have any leaves at all!!
Yes, Bill was the prettiest palm tree and he knew it.
Being pretty came with its downsides though and often Bill wondered if that was the reason he had yet to find love, perhaps people were too intimidated by his beauty. If it weren’t for his damn roots he would have searched the lands far and wide to find his one true love, but as it was, he hadn’t ever moved.
Once, Bill thought Katy Perry had managed to move but it turned out she’s just died when a hurricane blew her over. If she hadn’t been such a bitch to him about his leaves he would have felt sorry for her.
Once again, Bill sighed, wishing someone would sweep him
off his feet, in a manner of speaking. Then he looked down at his roots to survey the river of humans that flowed some twenty feet below.
Someone caught his eye. It was Tom. Bill knew it was Tom because often he paused beneath Bill’s shade to chat on the phone. Today was one of those days. Tom was gorgeous
, Bill thought. Tall, toned and tanned, he spoke with an exotic accent and when he leaned against Bill’s trunk Bill could practically feel
how sexy he was.
Tom stayed to chat to whoever was on the other end of the line for ten minutes and Bill did his best to protect him from the sun’s rays. He even rustled his leaves a bit, hoping to send down a cool breeze so Tom didn’t break out in a sweat under the relentless LA sunshine. Then Tom went on his way, moving easily between the crowds as he disappeared down the boulevard.
Bill sighed heavily again
, and desperately hoped than he and Tom were truly, madly, deeply in love in another life.
(Spoiler alert: TOM AND BILL ARE TRULY, MADLY, DEEPLY IN LOVE IN THIS